Tender Love Read online

  “Did it work?”

  “Finally, but it was a long session.” He yawned.

  Kristin had already placed four glasses of milk on the table, and muffins on napkins for each of them. Alice had intended to go to her room and not infringe on this short time Mark had with his kids, but she knew Kristin wouldn’t understand, so she sat down. She had no appetite, however, for as the children chattered about their day’s activities, from time to time, she sensed Mark’s eyes searching her face.

  Mark took the last bite of his muffin and asked for another one. “Is it all right, Alice?” Kristin asked.

  “Of course.”

  “Now, you kids, go upstairs, brush your teeth and get in bed. I’ll be up to kiss you good-night as soon as I finish my snack,” Mark said. “Kristin, help Eddie.”

  Alice started to tell him that Eddie didn’t need any help, but she decided to let Mark find that out for himself.

  As the sounds of their footsteps faded up the stairs, Mark spoke quietly, “What kind of help did they need tonight?”

  “Do you realize that Kristin and Eddie are afraid you’re going to die?”

  His face blanched, and Alice continued, “They think they’ll lose you like they did their mother. They can’t understand why God let their mother die. I tried to talk with them and reassure them, but I don’t know how to explain God’s will to children. Betty said you’re an excellent counselor—perhaps you can talk with them.”

  Mark laid down his fork, shoved the half-eaten muffin aside, and stared at the floor. At last he looked at her, and Alice was chilled by the bleak expression in his eyes.

  “I can’t give them any assurance when I don’t have any for myself. I don’t know what’s going to happen to us.”

  He pushed back his chair, and without a word left the kitchen. His footsteps sounded leaden as he climbed the stairs.

  Alice remembered something Betty once told her, “I think he’s lost his faith, and that’s a terrible thing to say about a man who was a powerhouse in the ministry.” Alice had purposely watched to see if Betty’s suspicions were true, but since Mark had always been upbeat, she decided that Betty was overly concerned. However, it had bothered Alice that God was never mentioned in the house, and that none of them attended church services. The family’s spiritual life had been neglected during Clarice’s illness, and Alice intended to start taking the children to Sunday school. But in light of Mark’s words tonight, she suspected that he did have a serious problem.

  If she was inadequate in comforting a couple of children, what words could she find to encourage Mark Tanner? And why should she concern herself about this man’s happiness—she’d come here only to be a nanny to his children, hadn’t she? Alice didn’t dare truly answer that question—not even to herself.

  Chapter Three

  The next morning, Mark had reverted to his pleasant self, and Alice sometimes wondered if she’d dreamed that moment when he seemed defeated, as if life had handed him more trouble than he could handle. Yet she knew she hadn’t imagined it, and during her daily devotions, she prayed for Mark’s spiritual condition.

  Mark had agreed to the housecleaning plan, and Alice had arranged for the women to come the day she took Kristin to church camp, for since Gran and Eddie were going along, the house would be empty for the workers. She’d replenished Kristin’s wardrobe without Mark questioning the cost. He was impressed with the secondhand garments she’d purchased, not realizing that some of the items were new. He gave Kristin a ten-dollar bill for her camp expenses, and was none the wiser when Alice doubled the amount. For the first time since John Larkin had died and willed her a fortune, Alice felt good about her money.

  Gran had protested when Alice invited her to go along.

  “Oh, no, Alice, you don’t want to be saddled with an old woman like me.”

  “Gran, you haven’t been out of the house since I’ve been here, and that isn’t healthy for you.”

  Interest dawning in her eyes, Gran continued to protest. “But I don’t think I can get in that van of yours.”

  “My husband was in a wheelchair the last several months of his life, and the van is equipped with a lift, which will make it easy for you to get in.”

  “All right. It’ll be nice to drive out in the country. The campsite is in a very pretty part of this state.”

  The camp was located near Charlottesville—the same camp Alice had attended when she was a girl, although quite a few improvements had been made since then, including an Olympic-size swimming pool. When she’d gone to camp, the swimming hole was in the creek, but she’d learned to swim there. It was at this camp that she’d dedicated her life to God, even then praying for a life of service. She’d thought her prayer had been fulfilled when she took care of John for several years, but perhaps that was just the beginning.

  Since the round-trip drive would take several hours, Mark had hesitated to allow Eddie to go with them.

  “He tires so easily,” he said. “I’m sure that Ethel will be glad to keep him. She’s helped out before when I didn’t have anyone to stay with the children.”

  “But, Daddy, I want to see where Kristin is going.”

  With a worried look, Mark finally agreed, but Alice wondered if he’d had second thoughts, when just before they were ready to start, Ethel barged into the house.

  “I’m taking care of Eddie while you’re gone.”

  “Eddie is going with us,” Kristin said. “Daddy said it’s all right.”

  “Perhaps he changed his mind,” Ethel said breezily, a smug look on her face as if she had information they didn’t.

  “I want to go, Alice,” Eddie said.

  “Of course, you’re going, Eddie, unless Mark tells me differently within the next five minutes.”

  She turned to Gran, who was limping down the stairs, and reached out a hand to help her descend the last two steps.

  “Then I’m coming with you, Alice,” Ethel said. “You’ll need help with Gran, and Eddie, as sickly as he is.”

  Eddie wilted at her statement, and annoyed, Alice said, “Eddie is not sickly. He doesn’t need any help.”

  But short of physically removing Ethel from her car, Alice was helpless in the face of the woman’s brashness, as Ethel took Gran’s arm, led her out of the house, helped her into the van, and preempted the front seat where Alice had expected Kristin to sit. Her aggressive behavior was annoying, but since Ethel had been helpful during Clarice’s illness and after her death, Alice wasn’t in a position to antagonize a friend of the family. She was provoked at herself because part of her anger stemmed from Betty’s comment that Ethel was angling for Mark’s attention by befriending his children.

  Ethel wasn’t a bad-looking woman. She was of medium height, with a slender waist, and shapely. Only a long thin nose kept her from having a beautiful face. Ethel was probably forty years of age, although she tried to disguise her few wrinkles with a heavy coat of makeup.

  “Do you know how to find the camp?” she asked as Alice left the city behind and headed into open country.

  “I attended camp there when I was a girl, but I wasn’t sure how to get there from Richmond, so Mr. Tanner gave me directions.”

  “You called him ‘Mark’ earlier. Why change to Mr. Tanner now?”

  “It depends on whom I’m talking to. I sometimes call him Daddy when I’m talking to his children.”

  That comment silenced Ethel for several miles, and when she started talking again, she addressed most of her remarks to Gran and the kids. Alice soon noted that Ethel had an adverse effect on Eddie. She constantly referred to his disability, and by the time they arrived at camp, Eddie was limp as a rag, and Alice had to persuade him to get out of the car.

  “I don’t feel good, Alice. I’ll stay in the van.”

  “Nonsense! You need to walk around a bit, and we’ll have lunch with Kristin before we start home.”

  They found a shady spot where Gran and Eddie could sit on a bench, and when Ethel would hav
e taken control of Kristin’s registration, Alice said firmly, “I’ll go with Kristin to register and find out where she’ll be staying. The rest of you stay here in the shade.”

  Picking up Kristin’s suitcase, Alice headed toward a log building that had a registration sign tacked on a post.

  The camp was located in a small river valley, with woodlands along its banks. A dozen log dormitories were scattered among the trees, and one long building with a wide veranda, that Alice took for the dining hall, was situated beside the swimming pool. A badminton court and a softball field were beyond the pool. From one point, they had a good view of the Blue Ridge Mountains.

  Kristin placed a trembling hand on Alice’s arm, and she knew that the child feared this new experience.

  “I don’t see Susie anywhere—she said she’d be here to meet me. She came to camp last year so she knows what to do.”

  “I’m sure she’ll arrive soon, and we won’t leave until she does come. I remember the first day I came to camp, and it was scary, but in a few hours, I felt right at home. You’ll enjoy yourself.”

  “I’ll miss Daddy.”

  “He’ll miss you, too, but you’ll be so busy with crafts, hiking and sports activities that the week will pass before you know it.”

  They entered the open door of the rustic building crowded with girls and their parents. One child detached herself from a group and ran toward Kristin.

  “That’s Susie,” Kristin said in relief.

  “Hi, Kristin. I’ve already registered and I was watching for you. We’re assigned to Bear Cabin—it’s a nice one. Come on, I’ll show you what to do.”

  Alice placed the suitcase in a corner where a lot of other luggage was stacked, and queued up with the two girls to wait their turn at the registration table. A young woman joined them and, with a broad smile, said, “I’m Susie’s mother, Erin Saberton. You must be Mrs. Larkin.”

  Alice shook hands with her. “Yes, I’m Kristin’s nanny. I’m glad to meet you. I hope you’ll let Susie visit Kristin when they return from camp. The house is too quiet.”

  With a laugh, Erin said, “It won’t be quiet if Susie is visiting.” She lowered her voice. “Susie’s wanted to visit, but Mark has been so withdrawn since Clarice’s death that I thought he didn’t want visitors.”

  “He’s gone so much that he does like to have evenings alone with his kids, but there’s no reason Susie can’t come during the daytime. I’ll be glad to have her.”

  “When the Tanners had only part-time nannies, I hesitated to send another child for them to oversee. But thanks for your invitation—Susie will telephone before she comes.”

  It was almost noon by the time Kristin was settled in Bear Cabin—a small cottage with five sets of crude bunk beds. There were a couple of lavatories in the cabin, but a central bathhouse would take care of their other needs. Alice helped Kristin make up her bunk bed, which was right below Susie’s. Mrs. Saberton had to return home, so Susie ate with Kristin and her family in the long dining room.

  As he watched the campers, Eddie’s spirits improved a little, showing interest in the place his sister would be living for a week. While they ate hot dogs, potato chips and cookies, Eddie said, “When can I come to camp, Alice?”

  “Not until you’re as old as Kristin.”

  “I doubt you’ll be able to be a camper, Eddie, so I wouldn’t count on it,” Ethel said.

  Eddie turned a piteous look in Alice’s direction, and she patted him on the back. She was too angry to answer Ethel, but she had her emotions under control when they were driving back to Richmond. Gran settled down for a nap, and when Alice saw that Eddie was sleeping tight in his seat belt, head leaning forward, she said to Ethel, “Why do you persist in making an invalid out of Eddie? I talked with his pediatrician, and he said that Eddie’s health problems have been corrected. He told me to encourage Eddie to live like any other five-year-old boy. I can’t do that if you keep telling him he’s sick.”

  Anger flashed from Ethel’s black eyes. “I’ve been looking after Kristin and Eddie since their mother got sick. It’s none of your business how I treat them.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. Mark has hired me to look out for his children, and I’m going to do that to the best of my ability.”

  “But you’re only a stranger—how can you know what’s better for them than I do?”

  “A stranger can often see things that others can’t. For instance, Eddie has made a slave out of Kristin—she runs at his beck and call, and it isn’t necessary. There isn’t any reason he can’t get a drink of water when he wants it, why he can’t go up and down the stairs without help, and I hope to instill some independence in him this week. Gran isn’t able to wait on him, I’m not going to, and I’ll appreciate it if you don’t interfere.”

  Ethel didn’t respond, but the look she cast in Alice’s direction was venomous, and Alice was convinced that she’d report the conversation to Mark.

  The cleaning women were just finishing when Alice returned. Even from the outside, the house looked better because the windows were clean and shining, and the lemony fresh smell inside the house was stimulating. After she settled Gran and Eddie in their rooms for a nap, Alice went to the porch where the women were washing the paneling.

  “The house looks great,” she said. “It won’t be so difficult to keep everything tidy now.” When she paid them before they left, she tripled the amount that Mark had laid aside for them, and the woman to whom she gave the money, stared at her speculatively. Apparently this was more money then they usually received, and she hoped she hadn’t overdone it. Since Mark was known to be hard up, people might start wondering where he was getting so much money.

  The next night, Alice asked Mark to help her set up the computer, and he readily agreed. Since she wanted to supervise the children’s use of the computer, they put it in her room.

  Mark protested a little. “Maybe we’d better set this up in the dining room—you could still keep your eye on them when they’re using the computer. They’ll want to use it all the time, and you won’t even have any privacy when you go to your room.”

  “We’ll see how it goes first.”

  Since she knew Eddie would want to try it out at once, Alice had stopped by the video store and rented an educational game. While Mark played the game with Eddie, Alice sat in the rocker and picked up her sewing basket. She hadn’t accomplished much on the tablecloth she was making for her sister since she’d come to the Tanners.

  “Time for bed, Eddie,” Mark said. “We’ll get your shower, and I’ll tuck you in.”

  Eddie went without much protest, and he came over to Alice, and kissed her cheek. “Thanks for bringing the computer, Alice. It’s been a fun thing to do with Daddy.”

  Alice laid down her embroidery and hugged him tightly, shutting her eyes to keep any tears from escaping. “You’re a good boy, Eddie,” she said. “I’m glad you’ve had a nice time.”

  “I’ll come back down after Eddie’s in bed, Alice. I noticed you have a Scrabble game on the hard drive. Can I challenge you to a game?”

  “But, Daddy, I’m afraid to go upstairs without Kristin. Won’t you stay upstairs with me?”

  Mark hesitated, but he said, “Not tonight, Son. You’ll soon be asleep, and I’ll hear you if you call.”

  Alice had always enjoyed playing Scrabble, and had been good at it, but she was no match for Mark. She could readily understand Betty’s comments about his superior intelligence, for he quickly spelled out a word clue. They played two games, and Mark won both of them. But Alice excused herself, for she couldn’t concentrate on the game, finding it difficult to think of any words. Mark’s name rolled over and over in her mind excluding all others, and of course, in Scrabble, she wasn’t allowed to use given names. They sat close together to have a good view of the screen, and when their shoulders touched or hands collided as they typed in their answers, Alice’s pulse raced and her temperature soared.

  “That’s not very n
ice of you—beating me on my own computer,” she said when Mark pushed back his chair. “I’ll have to withdraw your computer privileges.”

  Mark’s eyes softened into a smile. “Oh, don’t do that. This is the most pleasant evening I’ve spent for ages. We may do this every night.”

  “Not if you keep beating me,” she retorted, a smile on her face.

  Mark stood up and stretched, and Alice looked away quickly. “I’ll check to see if Eddie is okay, and then let’s sit on the patio. It’s a pleasant evening. I’ll open the window in Eddie’s room, so we’ll hear him if he calls.”

  Don’t do it, Alice. Keep this relationship on a professional level.

  But despite her qualms, when Mark came downstairs, she went with him to the backyard. He cleaned the lounge chairs with a cloth, and when she was seated, he stretched out on the chair beside her, breathing deeply.

  “Wow! It’s good to relax. I didn’t even take time for lunch today at the office, and thank you for the good meal tonight. After fasting all day, I really enjoyed it. You’re a good cook, Alice. You must have had lots of experience.”

  “My mother taught me and my sister to cook when we were girls, and I did several 4-H projects on foods and nutrition, so I started at an early age.” She didn’t mention that after her marriage, they’d kept the same cook John had employed when he was a widower.

  “Besides the work at the bank, the care of the kids almost overwhelms me at time. I had no idea the kind of burden a single parent carries, and sometimes I blush in shame when I realize how blithely I used to counsel single parents.”

  “But you’re a good father, Mark—you’ve done well with your children.”

  She saw him shake his head in the semidarkness, and a lock of hair fell over his forehead. “No, I’m not really. I’m neglecting some of the most important things they need to know.”

  She wondered if he referred to his lack of spiritual training. They were sitting close enough that Alice could have reached out and touched his arm in encouragement, but she refrained.